Charlie's Funeral

What a beautiful day.  Brendan's peaceful spirit continued to pervade the viewing and funeral.  Hundreds of wonderful friends and family provided lift and support.  We can't begin to thank everyone for all they have done for us.

(Here are a few pictures from today -- I'll post more later when I get them.)

This beautiful woman, my 98 year old grandmother, hoped to be on the other side to welcome Brendan when he got there.  Instead, she's still here comforting and loving us on this side.

 I felt so privileged to share Brendan's "Life Sketch" today.  Although short, he filled his life with all the good and important things. I'll include a copy at the end of this post.

 Each of the children shared a memory or something they learned from Brendan.  It was fun to hear their stories.  Friends of Brendan sang "Gethsemane."  Very touching.  Shaun gave a wonderful tribute to Brendan and taught us what Brendan already knew -- that God is in charge.

I never wanted to be in this spot in the funeral procession.  

The cemetery was so peaceful and beautiful.  I loved being there.  Here is my twin, Kim, and good friend, Cyndee, who brought beautiful roses for the kids to put on the casket.

 As usual, the Relief Society provided a delicious meal and a place to visit after the funeral and graveside service.  This church just knows how to take care of people.

 My wonderful mother, grandmother, and sisters.

So, what do you do after the funeral?   We came home exhausted.  Everyone slept (except Aaron, of course.)

 Tonight, it was hard to find a spot to eat a meal.  We are surrounded by beautiful flowers.  Shaun says it feels like the Garden of Eden.

 Then some "down time."  Music and puzzles.

Who knows what tomorrow brings?  For a long time, everything has been pointing toward this day.  The day we would lay Charlie to rest.  We are so grateful for the "peace of God, which passeth all understanding."  I don't know how this peace comes, but I'm grateful it does.

Brendan's Life Sketch

Brendan arrived in the world just after 11 p.m. on the night of July 2, 2004.  Fireworks at the USU stadium were just ending and I had hoped to have front row delivery room view, but we were just to the side and missed everything but the booms.  Brendan missed his cue and the fireworks ended just before Brendan made his grand entrance.  

Being the eighth child, Shaun and I couldn’t decide on a name we both liked for about 10 days.  In the meantime, I heard Shaun say, “Come here, Charlie Brown!”  And the name stuck.  Try as I might, I just could’t get the family to stop calling him Charlie.  So I called him Brendan, and everyone else called him Charlie.  I insisted he use his “official” name during school though — to avoid confusion.  As more and more people started using his nickname, though, it just caused more confusion.

Brendan grew up with little or no fanfare, he being a calm, quiet child in a large family.  He loved sports — basketball, baseball, football.  Someday he wanted to be a runner.  He was always begging us to go out and hit the ball with him, throw a few passes, or shoot a few hoops.  

Brendan attended school at Canyon Elementary where he loved school and loved his teachers.  He excelled in reading and in all of his studies, despite being the youngest in his class.

Brendan lost the distinction of being the “baby” of the family at age 5, when his younger brother, Aaron, was born.  Thus Brendan slipped into almost complete anonymity since he wasn’t the oldest, wasn’t the youngest, wasn’t the tallest, wasn’t the loudest.

On October 8, 2015, after rapidly losing the sight in his left eye, Brendan was diagnosed with an esthesioneuroblastoma - a rare form of cancer originating with an olfactory nerve cell.  The doctors estimated that in 6-8 weeks, the tumor grew rapidly in the sinus cavity and began pushing into his brain and the back of his eye socket and pushing on the optic nerve which eliminated the sight in his left eye.  It was later found that the cancer had spread to the lymph nodes in his neck as well.

Five surgeries, 33 days of radiation to his head and neck, and 5 week long rounds of chemo for the next five months appeared to eradicate the cancer from Brendan’s body.  Brendan happily returned to his 6th grade class at Spring Creek Middle School, enjoying his friends and teachers once again.

In May 2016 it was discovered that the cancer had spread to his bones and the decision had to be made whether to continue treatment that might prolong his life, participate in trial studies, or to end treatment all together.  Brendan was sure he did not want to do any more chemotherapy, especially if it meant more extended hospital stays.

Brendan initially decided to participate in some studies, but unfavorable test results, increasing pain and physical limitations soon led him to discontinue all treatments.  He just wanted to be at home with his family and be able and stay there.  

Brendan’s Make A Wish Trip was immediately moved up and our family was able to spend a wonderful week in Florida visiting Disney World and staying at “Give Kids the World.”  

Three weeks before Brendan passed away, he turned 12 years old, received the Aaronic priesthood and was able to pass the sacrament with his brother, Landon, pushing his wheelchair.  

The last few weeks of Brendan’s life were extremely painful for him and for those of us who watched him suffer.  We are forever grateful to the doctors, nurses, and assistants who made his remaining time on earth bearable.

So many family members, friends, and community members have loved and served Brendan and our family this past year.  We have witnessed a unity of purpose and a combining of faith — all of us coming together for Brendan’s sake.  He in turn blessed all of our lives by his unwavering faith and his sincere smile that radiated his love to all of us.  

Brendan passed away in the loving arms of his family on the morning of July 23, 2016 — right where he always wanted to be — at home with his family surrounding him.